Crying to Sleep

Thanks for taking the time to read this. Please share your thoughts with me afterward (even if you're not a mom or dad)!

As I have heretofore disclosed, I love being a Mom! And I spend much thought on what may be best for Samuel, who is now 2 1/2 months old and seems a contented baby. Thus far, I have simply focused on meeting his needs as I see them. A few days ago though, mainly out of curiosity, I picked up Babywise, which I received at a shower. I find many great recommendations therein, but I remain somewhat unconvinced by others. For example, I find setting a feed/wake/sleep pattern (in this order) a very good idea. Since he was born, I've been nursing Samuel roughly every three hours, so that wasn't a big change, but I haven't been strictly organizing his sleep patterns. I love the regularity that the suggested routine has brought me. I am getting more done, and Samuel really is sleeping better, or rather, more consistently.

That being said, my biggest question remains concerning the manner in which I let him fall asleep. Dr. Ezzo insists that a mother let her baby cry himself to sleep every time... no "sleeping props" (i.e. rocking or nursing to sleep, or sleeping with Mama), which he considers dangerous because they create a reliance on Mom to be able to fall asleep. I do think it's a good skill for baby be able to fall asleep on his own, but I am presently having a hard time with this. Granted, I haven't purposely let him just cry since he was born, and neither of us is used to it. So when I've tried it, he has wailed out of his sweet little mind. Despite the amount of time I've let him cry, he has not yet succeeded in falling asleep completely on his own. Maybe I haven't waited long enough. If I hold him until he's close to sleep, then put him down, he can fall asleep. He can also sometimes wake up during his slumber and fall back to sleep by himself.

What are your opinions on this? Despite his expertise on many points, in my mind, Dr. Ezzo isn't giving babies enough credit. I have reason to believe that they are more coherent and feeling than he propagates. He seems to believe that it is possible to "spoil a baby," thus leaving him unprepared for life. If I can get Samuel to sleep or near to sleep (by swaddling him, singing to him, or taking him on a walk) in the same time it would take him to cry himself to sleep, why not choose the less stressful path for both of us? Is there danger in this? Will the manner in which he falls to sleep minimize the quality of his sleep or lessen his ability to sleep through the night? If I help him get to sleep, will it undermine my ability to set boundaries for him once he understands them?

You are the experts. What have you found? Any thoughts? Ideas? Observations? Success stories? If it turns out that letting him cry himself to sleep every time is better for us, I am open to that. Talk to me.

My Favorites

The subject of this post comes from Keenan. Often, when he comes home or enters a room or gives us a hug, he says with a smile, "Hello, Favorites."

Yesterday the 9th was Keenan's birthday. It was mildly low-key, but we had some great food and Birthday Boy got to spend as much time as he wanted browsing Amazon for piano CDs and piano sheet music and books about piano, watching Youtube videos of distinguished pianists, listening to recordings of distinguished pianists, playing his own piano, and admiring his son's beautiful potential pianist fingers. Life was good. Wonderfully, all his engagements at school were canceled except his Piano Literature exam on Russian piano composers, which he enjoyed taking and probably aced. Here he is with his giant cookie, baked the night previous for his pre-birthday enjoyment. I should have shaped it into a piano.

Tuesday the 7th marked seven years since Keenan and I started dating. My associations with Keenan have greatly enriched my life, before our marriage and after. Our lives' paths shifted in just the right ways to see that we were led to meet just when we did, back in 2001. Through the incredible ups and the minor downs since, we have been blessed to learn very much about ourselves, individually and as a partnership. I must be the luckiest girl around because I doubt I could fashion a finer husband than the one I found. He always puts my needs before his own. He pushes me to do my best and believes in my ability to succeed in what I pursue. He never focuses on what is lacking but emphasizes the good he finds. He's a hard worker and a humble believer. He has a brilliant mind and a grateful heart. He is my truest friend. I'm glad I have a good long time ahead with him. :)

Keenan told me he wanted to marry me just a few months after we started dating (he was 18, I was 19). In pondering that possibility over the ensuing years, I was happy to think of marrying him so my sons would have someone like him to guide them and raise them up to good. Samuel is a lucky one indeed. For that matter, so are the young ladies he may frequent one day.

Tuesday was also Samuel's two-month birthday! He is doing great and it is such a treat to be his mother. I've been thinking much on mothering as of late. There's really nothing to it. Now don't be alarmed -- by that I mean that it really does come naturally. No one has to teach a mother to adore her child or discern his needs. Though the wealth of information written on the subject is informative and interesting, just becoming a mother endows a woman with all that is necessary to care for her little one. No matter the time of day or the need, it is always a pleasure for me to serve my little guy, and I've never been like that so constantly with anyone. Mothering is giving me the chance to become a better person much faster than I would otherwise be able. As I look at Samuel, I see him as an equal to myself and have a great deal of reverence and respect for him. Not that I come close, but I'm starting to understand how my own mother can be so cheerful and giving all the time. Women were meant to mother. I never really understood that until now. And I'm lovin' it.

Samuel has his whole thumb in his mouth in this photo.
He can get all the other fingers there in too.

In other news, last weekend we had a very enjoyable visit from Keenan's Dad -- our first house guest. Samuel seemed happy for the opportunity to get to know Grandpa Craig a little better. We're all glad he sacrificed the time at work to come out and see us where the sun shines best. Who's next?

(Note the HOLLYWOOD on the mountain behind...)

Irresistable...